Just Jess

Some of you may have seen my recent Blog articles on "GenCon for the Aspiring Professional". I'm happy to say that they reached far more readers than I ever anticipated (thanks in part to being Slashdotted and posted to Reddit) and I had many folks come up to me at the convention and mention they'd read them and found them useful, which I was very pleased about.

However, as with anything, there's always going to be a bit of negativity mixed in with the good.

On one of the forums where the links were posted, I was contacted by an individual who requested some of my time after having read the articles. Since my schedule was already beginning to fill up a bit, and since he hadn't expressed why he wanted to meet, I asked for clarification. He gave me some information about what he wanted, and it seemed that he had some unrealistic ideas about what my role in the industry was. As well, he seemed to want to use my contacts to promote his own agendas, which is (as I'm sure you all agree) is just rude and presumptous, especially coming from someone who I don't even know.)

However, rather than point out his rudeness, I politely but firmly expressed that I couldn't do for him what he wanted me to, but that I wished him well. I thought this was the end of it, until a random google search for an unrelated topic brought a recent blog post he'd made to my attention...

His post is contained, in its entirety, below...
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I was going to respond on his blog, but then realized that I really didn't want to send any more traffic his direction. I mean, he probably has tens of readers... (oh, wait... fives of readers, if most of his blog views are accurate...) and I wouldn't want to overwhelm his site. I also didn't want to take any chances on my words being edited or deleted... Not that I think such a professional person would consider doing such a thing, but better safe than sorry...
And, while I realize that the 100% professional response would have been to just ignore this rant, I also didn't feel quite right about doing that. While I have no desire to engage in a flame war, I was directly, and by name, attacked - and that deserves some sort of response. I did, however, feel that it was necessary to show that such a response could be achieved, even in the face of such insults, without lowering one's self into unprofessionalism.

So, here's a "public" response.


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Dear (Name Redacted),
Firstly, I feel you misrepresented our communications, thus I am including them here.
Your request (fleshed out after I asked for clarification) was:

"Simply enough ... I found you. Not every gamer professional has as solid a web presence as you do - you encourage podcasting, and basically ... you seem PR savvy and I would like to sit for a moment and talk about stuff and things. The D&D PhD being one of them. A marketing proposal for the industry being another. Certainly you could pencil me in for a quick chat - ten to thirty minutes sometime durring
the convention? What would really be awesome is if you could arrange for one of the podcasters to be there so the lucky guy could have "Recording of Jess Hartley and (Name Redacted) discussing the future of gaming" as their Podcast title!"

My response was:

"(Name Redacted),

Thank you. I do work very hard on PR and marketing myself - I think it's a vital skill for a freelancer.

I have to be honest with you, however - I've read over your D&D PhD thread, and while I totally respect and support you making this your focus, it's not really something I am interested in or have time to advocate. 

Nor am I responsible in any way for any industry marketing other than my own attempts to create a brand for myself.  Each company has professional employees who handle those sorts of decisions for their organization, and speaking to me, as a freelancer, about your ideas is going to be no more useful to you than speaking to your mailman or local grocer about them. It's just not my role within the industry.

As well, podcasters normally come to me asking for information about a particular product or game they believe their listeners would find interesting. I don't hold any favored status - I'm an information source for them, if they're looking for particular topics. It's not really my place to "pitch" interview ideas to them. If you would like to do so, their contact information is commonly available on the internet - perhaps you can find one that would be interested in speaking with you about your D&D PhD idea.

I'm sorry to be a downer, but it sounds like the things you're trying to achieve are not things I can help you with. I do wish you the best of luck, however!

 ~jess "

To which you responded:

"Aww, Jess!I am not trying to do anything more than talk. Publicity is publicity. Imagine the impact on your reputation when I am successful "

To be blunt, you were asking me for things which were out of my sphere of influence, and in doing so, displayed a glaring lack of knowledge about how the professional gaming industry works, combined with an appallingly large dose of entitlement and egotism. You asked for things which, had they been within my power to do, would be large personal favors (asking me to pull strings on your behalf to get podcast coverage for a conversation to promote your ideas), and rudely suggested that I should do so to aid my own career.

I responded politely but firmly, explaining in simple but polite terms my views of the situation.

First, your personal mission (D&D PhD) is not mine, and I have no interest in promoting or supporting it - I will not critique it, but I have no interest in spending time on it. If I wasn't upfront with folks who have "pet projects" that I'm not going to jump on the bandwagon of, I'd waste their time and mine, and that's hardly professional.

Secondly, I am a freelance writer. I have nothing to do with any company's marketing or publicity. Companies hire me to write words for them, or to edit their books. Period. I am a contractor who provides a service - writing or editing. I am not a "PR insider". I have no "marketing team". I'm uncertain of why you fail to understand this, but it is a simple fact. I write. I edit. I make games.

And, thirdly, I do not approach podcasts and ask them to record me doing things, even on my own personal projects. To do so would change my relationship with the media of the industry, and I would not do so on my own behalf, let alone on behalf of someone I do not know. To ask me for such a favor, when it might negatively impact my hard-earned relationship with the industry's media, is not only presumptuous, it is rude.

I answered you honestly, politely, and firmly. For you to lambaste me upon your blog only reiterates how far from "professional" you truly are.

Perhaps, before you take umbrage at others' actions, you should look in the mirror and reflect upon your own? You obviously were seeking to use my contacts and name to promote your own project, despite us having no sort of business or professional relationship. You asked me for wholly inappropriate favors, and then insulted me by trying to state that associating with you and your ideas would benefit my career (despite the fact that you're, at best, an aspiring professional in the industry.) And then you turn around and, rather than accept my polite demure of your requests - attempt to paint /me/ as unprofessional? Put words in my mouth, claiming that I had "obviously" made unsavory assessments of you? Call my polite response "BS"?

I do not know what you were taught, sir... But to assume that everyone who you request time of (regardless of how or why) owes it to you, is not politeness. Your responses, both in your letters and here, only prove my assessment correct (which was not that you were crazy or retarded, but that your views and way of doing things was not compatible with mine and that you were not someone whom I desired to become closer associated with).

I still wish you the best. I hope that you do find those whose goals and ways of doing things suit your personality and projects. However I am not that person, and if you would like to do business in this or any other industry, you would be well served to remember that a) your words will be heard, but not necessarily in the way you would prefer them to be, and b) no one owes you anything, and if you behave as if they do, you will be treated like the ill-mannered, egotistical, self-important, clueless wretch that you are portraying.

Sincerely,
~jess hartley
www.jesshartley.com

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I can assure you that, while my earlier opinion of this writer was "not really my thing, but hopefully he'll find the information he needs", his direct and personal attack against me has definitely swayed my opinion in a negative direction.  I hope that he finds, not only the information he was seeking, but additionally some insight on how the industry works as well as how inter-personal communications work.

Provided here, as an example of "What not to do" when interacting with folks in the industry... A lesson that I am sorry to have to be bringing forth, but which I hope others will learn from as well.